“Biblical Counseling and Real
Change”
A
MATH606 COUNSELING THESIS
Written
in partial requirements for the Master Degree in Ministry
Great
Commission Bible College
Carl
Junction, Missouri,
July
9, 2016
By
Clayton
R. Hall Jr.
Introduction
“One way of defining
biblical counseling is, ‘Biblical counseling is broken people helping other
broken people find healing through the power of the Gospel and in the power of
the Spirit as they apply the living principles of Scripture to life.’ Ultimately
this is possible because a broken Messiah ministers to broken people.”[1]
When people are trapped
in addiction, when married people cannot get along no matter how hard they try,
or when people are so trapped by their fears that they can’t function normally
on a day to day basis, something needs to change. The only way to bring change
in these circumstances is counseling. As counselors we must determine what the
goal of counseling should be.
Secular humanists who
follow Freud’s model would have us believe that it is not the individual that
needs to change, but society must change and become more “tolerant” and
understanding. They believe that people misbehave and demonstrate “insane”
behavior because society has placed unreasonable moral expectations upon them.
Expectations such as: thou shall not steal, thou shall not commit adultery,
thou shall not lie, and thou shall love the Lord your God and honor Him. They
say that when man does not meet the requirements of such expectations, the
false guilt drives him to insanity, so in order for the counselee to become
sane again, society must learn to tolerate his deviance and he must embrace his
behavior as normal.
As a Christian, I believe
that the problem lies within the individual’s inability to get along with God. I believe that regardless of the problem(s) that
bring a person to counseling, the goal must be to restore the relationship of
the counselee with God. All abnormal behavior, if not organic in nature, is the
result of individual sin and a resistance to an appropriate relationship with
God. I agree that it is guilt that leads people to act in a manner that could
be described as “insane,” but I do not believe that it is false guilt. The
guilt is the result of violating the principles of God’s holiness and the only
way to restore sanity is to repent and begin living according to the principles
of God’s Word.
Thesis
Statement
The goal of all biblical counseling
is change, real, lasting, and beneficial change that provides the counselee
with a substantial improvement in their quality of life. The very reason that Jesus
came and suffered, the reason He took our infirmities upon Himself, was so that
our lives would be full:
“I
have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”[2]
Mere behavior modification
cannot provide the type of “full” life that Jesus was referring to because it
does not deal with the root cause of the problem. Real change is not a matter
of simply modifying the counselee’s behavior. If it were people could be
delivered through a simple set of rules, but the Word makes it clear that
sinful behavior cannot be restrained by a code of ethics.
Real change, change that
is acceptable to God, can only occur when counseling is Christ-centered.
Biblical counseling must seek to restore the relationship of the counselee with
God through submission to His will, obedience to His Word, and by the
transformational power of the Holy Ghost.
Topic
One: The Focus of Biblical Counseling
The Primary focus of
biblical counseling must be to restore the counselee’s relationship with God. Most
counselors, even some Christian counselors, when dealing with unacceptable
behavior during counseling wrongly focus too much on man’s interpersonal
relationships with each other as the root cause of the problem. They tend to be stuck in the plane of
horizontal relationships; when the real issue that causes relational problems
on that horizontal plane is an incorrect relationship with God on the vertical
plane.
Jesus made it clear to us
that our relationship with God must be right before our relationship with man
can be right. Jesus said:
“The first of all the
commandments is, Hear, O Israel; The Lord our God is one Lord: And thou shalt
love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all
thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the first commandment. And the
second is like, namely this, thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. There is
none other commandment greater than these.”[3]
Jesus gave us the answer
to having positive relationships with other people on this horizontal plane
that we live in: First our relationship with God, the vertical relationship
with our Creator, must be right and then our dealings and relationships with
those around us can be made right. Logically therefore, the opposite must be
true as well. If a person persists in having an improper relationship with God,
it will be impossible for them to sustain proper and meaningful relationships
with others.
The marriage relationship
is a perfect example of what I am talking about. Couples cannot continue to have
an improper relationship with God and expect to have a meaningful relationship
with each other. The Apostle Peter wrote:
“Likewise, ye husbands,
dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife, as unto the
weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your
prayers be not hindered.”[4]
When we take the vertical
relationship to God seriously, it makes it impossible to dismiss the failures
of marriage as immaturity or simple incompatibility. When we look at it from
the perspective of God’s Word, marriages fail because one or both partners fail
to put their relationship with God first. Human relationships are not a
two-way, but a three-way affair. Therefore, all meaningful change, change that
produces abundant life, cannot only involve change in the way that we relate to
each other, it must also involve an honest change in our relationship with God.
Dr. Jay Adams states:
“To that extent it is
complex, unlike simplistic efforts to effect change without reference to God.
Any counselor that wishes to counsel biblically must reckon with the
complexities of change.”[5]
Topic
Two: Biblical Counseling Produces Right Thinking
True biblical counseling does not seek to
simply modify the counselee’s behavior, its goal is to transform the way they
think and provide them with an example of correct behavior to pattern their
life after:
“Do not conform to the
pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”[6]
“For those God foreknew
he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be
the firstborn among many brothers and sisters.”[7]
I think that it is
regrettable that so many Christian counselors have been willing to embrace more
simplistic methods of counseling theories and practices, which were developed
by humanists, and therefore have no place for the centrality of God in regard
to meaningful change. That is why their superficial successes have no power to
effect real and lasting change. An effective Christian counselor understands
that the counselee’s welfare depends upon their relationship to Jesus. Dr. Larry
Crabb states it this way:
“Many counselors neglect
this key to true Christian transformation and try to change something
else…Right behavior without right thinking produces a labored, pressured,
effortful brand of Christian obedience. Right behavior springing from right
thinking yields a joyful, natural, desired obedience to the God who has made us
whole persons, both significant and secure.”[8]
When counselors choose to
use these humanistic methods of counseling their good results only appear to be
good. If the centrality of God in the
healing process of the counselee is ignored, it will be impossible for these
seemingly good results to last over time. Why? Because improper behavior is the
result of sin, sin is the result of temptation, and temptation is the product
of our own evil desires. If all that happens is that the counselee stops to
behave abnormally, but the desire to pursue their evil desire is not removed,
they will continue to be:
“dragged
away and enticed by their own evil desires”[9]
That can clearly be seen
in the case of the alcoholic. A counselor can work with an alcoholic so that
they are able to maintain sobriety for long periods of time. Eventually,
however, most alcoholics will drink again unless a fundamental change occurs in
their thinking. In order for most alcoholics to remain sober for the rest of
their life, the desire to drink must be removed through the power of the Holy
Spirit.
Look at the first three
and the last two of the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous:
“Step One – Admitted that
I was powerless over alcohol and that my life had become unmanageable. Step Two
– Came to believe that only a power greater than myself could relieve my
insanity. Step Three – Made a conscious decision to turn my life over to the
care of God. Step Eleven - Sought through prayer and meditation to
improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying
only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out. Step
Twelve Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we
tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in
all our affairs.”[10]
Alcoholics Anonymous only
works for those who are willing to work the steps, and the steps are intended
to lead you to God. I am a recovered alcoholic, and I can tell you from years of
being involved in the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous, that until the
individual who suffers from this spiritual malady is willing to surrender their
life to God, they almost never find any true freedom (AA for the purpose of
protecting anonymity does not allow outside researches to survey their members,
so no exact statistics are not currently available). Most of those who do not
achieve a spiritual transformation as a result of improving their relationship
with God, will die from the effects of alcoholism. Even when they are not
drinking the alcoholic will find it nearly impossible to experience true joy
until their relationship with God is restored.
Our relationship with God
can only be restored by right thinking.
Once a counselee realizes that sin is the root cause of their improper
behavior, they begin the journey toward inward healing. Inward healing and
right thinking is the goal because outward change, simple modified behavior,
gives the counselee a wrong sense of self-sufficiency.
Topic
Three: Change Without Repentance Produces Self-Righteousness
The problem with external
change without heart felt repentance is that it leads to feelings of self-righteousness.
Outward change may appear good to others, even to one’s self, but in God’s eyes
this type of superficial change is unacceptable. Why? Counseling that creates external
changes, but do not include an inward change of the heart toward God usually
only serve to drive the counselee further away from Him. Change that may appear to society as good,
may in fact, be spiritually evil:
“There is a way which
seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.”[11]
Why is it that such
results are unacceptable to God? Isn’t it enough for the alcoholic to just stop
drinking, for marriage partners that were at war to live in peace, or for
thieves to stop stealing? The answer to this question is fundamental to real
change.
Let’s take a look at the
most self-righteous group of people that the Bible portrays. To most of the
Jews that were living during the time of Jesus, the Pharisees would have been
considered “good” people. They obeyed every aspect of the Law, they
meticulously observed all the required religious ceremonies, and they were the
model of a good Jew for the others in their communities. By all external
appearances they had arrived, their lives were in perfect order, and their
personal problems didn’t get out of control. Most of the Pharisees were
probably pretty satisfied with themselves. But Jesus had a completely different
perspective:
“For I say unto you, that
except your righteousness shall exceed the righteousness of the scribes and
Pharisees, ye shall in no case enter into the kingdom of heaven.”[12]
Jesus went on to point
out that the righteousness of the Pharisee was an external show and had no
eternal or spiritual value, because it was not from the heart. Their
religiosity, was not pleasing to God:
“And when thou prayest,
thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the
synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men.
Verily I say unto you, they have their reward.”[13]
This external form of
religiosity, which appeared outwardly to meet the requirements of God, was very
self-gratifying to those who practiced it. We can determine this from scripture
because Jesus portrayed the Pharisee as a self-satisfied person in the story of
the Pharisee and the Tax Collector (Luke 18:9-14) On another occasion, Jesus
made it clear that the Pharisees seen no need for repentance because they did
not view themselves as being sick or in need of help:
“But their scribes and
Pharisees murmured against his disciples, saying, why do ye eat and drink with
publicans and sinners? And Jesus answering said unto them, they that are whole
need not a physician; but they that are sick. I came not to call the righteous,
but sinners to repentance.”[14]
External change may look
good to others, it may even seem good to the counselor and counselee, but if it
does not include repentance, it is unacceptable to God. Biblical counseling
does not seek merely to reform, but to transform.
As an example: if an
alcoholic stops drinking, he no longer drives drunk, he doesn’t kill an
innocent person, and he doesn’t go to jail: these results are good from a
social perspective, but if that external change does not involve a change in
his attitude toward God, specifically a repentant heart, it creates a person
who is pleased with themselves, but unpleasing to God. They, in essence, have become
like the Pharisee. Restraining a person’s tendency toward evil, is not the same
as helping them to become righteous:
“Counselors must
distinguish between righteous change, which comes from Christ, and the
self-righteous change of modern day scribes and Pharisee.”[15]
Topic
Four: Two Kinds of Good
There are two kinds of
“good” that we are faced with, and these two “goods” are at odds with each
other. Jesus rebuked the rich young ruler for calling Him good (Luke 18:19).
Jesus did not rebuke the young man because He was not good, Jesus corrected him
because he had a humanistic viewpoint of what “good” involved. The young man perceived
that he had achieved goodness by observing the Law of Moses, and so he was
judging Jesus by the same standard. So when he called Jesus “good,” he was
judging Jesus by the opposite standard of what God considers “good.” Jesus was
in essence saying that unless you are willing to call me good, like God is
good, then don’t call me “good” at all. Jesus made a very clear contrast between
what the young man considered good, an external, social, pharisaic, and
humanistic perspective of goodness, and the goodness that existed in His own
sinless heart.
The first kind of “good”
is the good perceived by counselees in that they have changed and become a
positive member of society. They are now able to get along with others, earn a
living, and contribute to their communities in a manner that is seen as
helpful. The second “good,” is what the Lord considers “good,” and calls
righteousness. This is a good that comes from turning away from our sin,
yielding our lives to God, and contributing to His kingdom in a way that
demonstrates our love for Him:
“Whoso loveth instruction
loveth knowledge: but he that hateth reproof is brutish. A good man obtaineth
favour of the Lord: but a man of wicked devices will he condemn. A man shall
not be established by wickedness: but the root of the righteous shall not be
moved.”[16]
Once again, as Christians
involved in counseling, our desired outcome is transformation not reformation.
It should be the goal of all Christian counselors to lead counselees toward a
change that is acceptable to God, and not to an outcome that is merely “socially”
acceptable. No one would argue that it is better for everyone, the alcoholic,
the families of the alcoholic, and society, for the alcoholic to not drink;
however, the goal of the Christian counselor is not to produce positive social
change in the counselee, but spiritual transformation
The goal of every Christian counselor is to teach
the Word of God, minister to the spiritual needs of the counselee, and
encourage a repentant heart that results in a restored relationship between the
counselee and God. God has not called the Christian counselor into His service
to merely produce Pharisees, He has called us to minister His Word to those who
are suffering, in a life-transforming way. This cannot be accomplished through
humanistic methods of counseling.
True life transformation
can only be accomplished as God himself produces a transformation in the heart
of the counselee. The Christian counselor’s goal then, is not social reform,
but spiritual transformation. Spiritual transformation, life-changing
transformation, can only take place when God draws the counselee closer to
Himself through the working of the Holy Spirit.
Topic
Five: Real Change Is The Work of The Holy Spirit
Biblical counseling,
Christian counseling that results in “real change,” is absolutely the work of
the Holy Spirit. After all, the Holy Spirit is our counselor:
“But
the Helper (Comforter, Advocate, Intercessor—Counselor, Strengthener, Standby),
the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name [in My place, to
represent Me and act on My behalf], He will teach you all things. And He will
help you remember everything that I have told you.”[17]
The very purpose that God
sent the Holy Spirit was to be our counselor (Gr. παράκλητος, Lat. paracletus)[18] Jesus
said that he was not leaving us comfortless, but that He was sending us a
comforter, or counselor, to help us
deal with the issues of life so that we could have peace in this world of
chaos. It was Jesus’ intent for us to be whole:
“I’m leaving you well and
whole. That’s my parting gift to you. Peace. I don’t leave you the way you’re
used to being left—feeling abandoned, bereft. So don’t be upset. Don’t be
distraught.”[19]
Biblical counseling must
always involve prayer and the Word, but not simply as tools or a
methodology. Prayer and scripture in
counseling, as in ordinary Christian life, are means of inviting the presence of
the Living God to become involved in our situation, because He alone is able to
transform our circumstance. Scripture reminds us of the teachings and
commandments of God. Prayer and scripture will help, but as Christian
counselors we should long to see the counselee embrace and receive the love
that God has for them, and then as transformation begins, to begin to extend
that love to others. Why should we desire this for them? Because there is one
who desires it even more than we do; The Holy Spirit.
Since the Holy Spirit is
the primary agent in biblical counseling, biblical counseling is not simply a
dialogue between the counselor and the counselee, it is a three-way
relationship. Many books ask, “What is the role of the Holy Spirit in
counseling?” But I believe that instead of asking what His role is, we should
be seeking to determine what our role as counselors is in the work of the Holy
Spirit. It is vital for the Christian counselor to understand that we are
participants in the work of the Holy Spirit.
We talk to the counselee,
we listen to them, we pray with them, and we read scripture with them, but it
is the Holy Spirit that moves in their heart so that principles, the seeds,
that are planted by the counselor can germinate and take root in their life.
This can only be accomplished as the counselor, through his relationship with
the Holy Spirit, utilizes spiritual gifts to impart the power for change. Counseling that does not depend on the
impartation of spiritual gifts through the power and presence of the Holy
Ghost, is not biblical counseling and it cannot lead to “real change.”
The primary reason that
the humanistic counselor cannot help to foster “real change” in the life of the
counselee is because they do not have a relationship with the Holy Spirit of
God. Likewise, many so called “Christians” who counsel broken individuals, but
are not filled with the Holy Ghost, can never help them find healing from their
brokenness because they fail to avail themselves of the power and direction of
the Holy Ghost. I believe that these
religious counselors are some of the very people that he Apostle Paul was
referring to when he said, that these men have a form of godliness, but deny
its power (2 Timothy 3:5). All counseling, to be “Christian,” must be done under
the anointing, and in cooperation with the sanctifying and regenerating
ministry of the Holy Ghost. Dr. Jay Adams states it this way:
“By-passing the Spirit
amounts to the denial of human depravity and the affirmation of man’s innate
goodness.”[20]
Conclusion
Most preachers that I
know would never dream of trying to preach change in a person’s life as reformation;
as ministers of the gospel we understand clearly that real change only occurs
through the regenerating work of the Holy Ghost. Once everything “has become
new, through regeneration, acceptable change in the regenerate person’s life
comes through in the inward sanctifying work of the Holy Ghost. Yet I have seen
time and time again, these same preachers, men of God who come out of their
pulpits and enter the counseling room and they engage in a process of
counseling that produce socially acceptable, outward change, with no eternal
benefit for the counselee.
Many of these pastors and
other ministers have been deceived in liberal seminaries and so called
“Christian Counseling” books that promote humanistic counseling processes and
theories. When these humanistic practices are woven well enough with religious
speak, they can be disguised as “Christian.”
If there was ever any
group of people in the history of mankind that were truly religious, it was the
Pharisees. But Jesus called for a righteousness that exceeded that of the
Pharisee. All righteousness apart from the righteousness of Christ is “filthy
rags.” The Pharisees, because they did not understand the righteousness of God,
tried to manufacture their own form of righteousness (Romans 10:3).
As Christian counselors
we cannot make the mistake of leading those we counsel down that same path of
self-righteousness. God has called us to a ministry of reconciliation between
the counselee and God. In order for change to be real: it must come from an
inward change of the heart, it must restore a correct relationship between the
counselee and God, and it can only be accomplished through the regenerating and
sanctifying work and power of the Holy Ghost. Nothing less will be acceptable
to God, nor can it be called “Christian,” because social reform, is not “real
change.”
Bibliography
Adams, Dr. Jay. Competent to Counsel. Grand
Rapids: Zondervan Publishing House, 1970. Book.
<http://www.zondervan.com/competent-to-counsel>.
—. How to Help People Change. Grand Rapids:
Zondervan Publishing House, 1986. Book. <http://www.zondervan.com/how-to-help-people-change>.
Biblical Counseling Coalition. Christ-Centered
Biblical Counseling: A Practical Theology of Biblical Counseling. Eugene:
Harvest House Publishers, 2013. Book.
<http://biblicalcounselingcoalition.org/christ-centered-biblical-counseling/>.
Hodder & Stoughton. New International Verson
(NIV). UK: Zondervan Publishing House, 1984. Bible.
<https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_International_Version>.
Inc., AA World Services. Alcoholics Anonymous.
New York: Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc., 2001. Book.
<http://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/en_bigbook_chapt5.pdf>.
Jr., Dr. Larry Crabb. Effective Biblical
Counseling. Grand Rapids: Zondervan Publishing House, 1977. Book.
<http://www.zondervan.com/effective-biblical-counseling>.
King James Bible (KJV). London: King James's Printer: Robert Barker, 1611.
Bible. <https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/King_James_Version>.
Newheiser, Jim. Introduction to Biblical
Counseling. 2006. Book. <http://www.ntslibrary.com/Introduction%20to%20Biblical%20Counseling.pdf>.
Peterson, Eugene H. The Message. Peterson,
2002. Bible. <https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Message_(Bible)>.
Thayer, John Henry. Thayer's Greek-English
Lexicon. New York: New York American Book Company, 1889. Dictionary.
<https://archive.org/details/greekenglishlexi00grimuoft>.
The Lockman Foundation. Amplified Bible (AMP).
La Habra: Zondervan Publishing House, 1987. Bible.
<https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amplified_Bible>.
[1]
Baker and Holmes Christ Centered Biblical Counseling, p.36
[2]New
International Version (NIV) John 10:10b
[3]
King James Bible (KJV) Mark 12:29-31
[4]
Ibid I Peter 3:7
[5]
Adams How to Help People Change p.15
[6]
New International Version (NIV) Romans 12:2
[7]
Ibid Romans 8:29
[8]
Crabb Effective Biblical Counseling p.139
[9]
New International Version (NIV) James 1:14
[10]
Alcoholics Anonymous Fourth Edition, Chapter 5 “How it Works” p.59
[11]
King James Bible (KJV) Proverbs 14:12
[12]
Ibid Matthew 5:20
[13]
Ibid Matthew 6:5
[14]
Ibid Luke 5:30-32
[15]
Adams How to Help People Change p.17
[16]
King James Bible Proverbs 12:2-4
[17]
Amplified Bible (AMP) John 14:26
[18]
Thayer’s Greek-English Lexicon
[19]
The Message (MSG) John 14:27
[20]
Adams Competent to Counsel p.20
